It hurts and it will hurt for a while. I know that it is not the most comforting open statement, but it is the truth. Divorce is an event that can wound a person well into the future. It does so without a thought. That is just want divorce does. Don’t expect it to care, it won’t. Divorce is not capable of it.
Because of this, we must choose to deal with it. We must choose to deal with the hurt, exhaustion, sense of loss, the abandonment, and the lack of companionship that is the result of this occurrence. If not, it will deal with us. As I sit here I am reminded of the initial feelings of my divorce and the ocean of loneliness that I experienced. I had a daughter to put through college, trying to find a job, and trying to put food in the fridge. I did not realized how much I needed someone I could call on. I had to deal with the bliss that my then friends where having in their lives, and the devastation I was having in mine. Reality can’t be avoided. It must be dealt with.
The second harsh truth is that the “someone” that you are thinking will be there, probably won’t. You may have to sit some days alone while hugging yourself. For some, your tears will ruin a few freshly applied make-up sessions. It’s okay. For others, the overwhelming feelings of grief will push you to behave totally out of character! Stay close to God. The pieces of you can come back together again. You are going to have to deal with it. All of it. Not just some of it. But whatever you do, don’t run from it. God is there. He will help you to confront the obstacles ahead; not just in prayer but in practical guidance and counsel through His word.
One thing is for sure, you are not obligated to deal with everything at once. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. So take it one obstacle at a time. Take it one day at a time. For every challenge, victory is absolutely possible, don’t give up. God will give you the strength to deal with it all, in the perfect time.
To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: 2A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; 3A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; 4A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; 5A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; 6A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; 7A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; 8A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.